evanmpeterson, LLC, is officially an employer - NOT

The Illinois Department of Employment Security has reversed their original classification of evanmpeterson, LLC, as "an employer subject to the provisions of the Illinois Unemployment Insurance Act." evanmpeterson, LLC, is a private practice and I am a sole proprietor. I have no employees but I was originally told I must pay quarterly unemployment taxes. Consider how silly that could get:

• Perhaps I show up to work drunk some morning and fire myself as unfit for duty. As a business owner, I might try to fight my unemployment claim for exhibiting gross misconduct, but I would probably lose because substance abuse that prevents someone from working has not generally been considered gross misconduct.
• Perhaps instead of going to a scheduled appointment, I just hang out at home and listen to the new Dethklok CD with my boys. If I then fire myself for job abandonment, I could then trot on down to the Department of Unemployment Security and file a claim to receive unemployment benefits for getting fired.
• Perhaps I steal a roll of stamps from evanmpeterson, LLC, for personal use, fire myself for theft, and then file an unemployment claim. As a business owner, I could fight my own claim and succeed in preventing myself from collecting unemployment benefits because stealing is gross misconduct.
• Perhaps people just stop calling for my services and I can no longer pay my bills, so I have to lay myself off to cut costs. I could then collect unemployment benefits for laying myself off.

There'll be no drunkenness, Dethklok, or stamp stealing for me. And please keep calling and I'll keep working. I don't have the heart to fire or lay myself off anyway and now I can't collect unemployment benefits if I do. Which makes sense.